How Can We Have Unconditional Love?
How Can We Have Unconditional Love?
Author and Christian Psychologist Larry Crabb made it very clear that self-protection impedes love. In fact, he viewed self-protection as a manipulative barrier born out of fear and pain of rejection. But aren’t we all tempted to protect ourselves when we’re verbally attacked, insulted, or disrespected? When it comes to managing challenging relationships, some of us can erect healthier boundaries while others crumble from within. It’s common for people to end a friendship if they are offended or feel neglected and abused. Sometimes, that may be God’s will, because not all our relationships are forever. But are we meant to close a door simply because they hurt our feelings?
The Bible provides wonderful and clear guidelines on loving people who may be deemed “unlovable,” which can be the toughest love of all. Do we retreat to make the hurts and demeaning comments disappear, or do we trust the Lord to guide us through conflict in challenging relationships? Proverbs 17:9 says, “Whoever covers an offense seeks love, but he who repeats a matter separates close friends.”
But how in the world do we accomplish such things when the temptation is to write that person off and move on? Here’s the kicker: In John 13:34-35, Jesus said to His disciples: “A new commandment I give to you, that you love one another . . . By this all people will know you are my disciples, if you have love for one another.” Well, that’s easy for Jesus to say, because He’s God, but how do we accomplish this? Romans 5:5 says, “and hope does not put us to shame, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit who has been given to us.” With the power of the Holy Spirit who dwells within each believer, we can activate the love that God has poured into our hearts. Perhaps unconditional love can only be successfully manifested in us when we choose to trust God to keep us moving toward the other person in difficult situations, rather than walking away from them.
Let us Walk in His Way
Dear Heavenly Father, please give us Your unconditional love for others, so that they may see that “we are Christians by our love,” which brings You glory. Please pour out Your amazing love in and through us as we navigate challenging relationships this side of Heaven. In Jesus’ Loving Name, Amen.
by Corinne “Kinney” deHamel
author of “Walk in His Way” for
Carry the Light Ministries
