Fortified Marriages: The Commentary

Episode 11

Hello, and welcome to In the Lighthouse: your safe harbor from the storm. Brought to you by Carry the Light Ministries. I’m Daphne Collins, your Lighthouse Keeper. I hope you enjoyed Parts One and Two of Fortified Marriages and my talk with Chris and Carmen Garner. Today, I’m joined by my fellow ministry partner and friend, Melissa Saenz, and she’s brought her husband Jimmy along to participate in our discussion. This episode is entitled, Fortified Marriages: The Commentary, and Melissa and Jimmy will share their thoughts about what they learned from Chris and Carmen’s time here In the Lighthouse. Plus, I will comment from a single person’s perspective. Melissa and Jimmy have been married for 31 years, and, as you will hear directly from them, they needed to learn much about each other in order to understand how to cultivate and maintain their own garden of a marriage. If you are married and have been looking for guidance to overcome the common obstacles you and countless others experience daily in their marriages, consider visiting Chris and Carmen’s website: www.fortifiedmarriages.com and ordering their manual Fortified Marriages: How to Build and Maintain a Strong Marriage and Family. I pray that you and your spouse will commit your whole being to the work that it takes to restore your garden to the intended beauty that is purposed by God. Okay, let’s get started!

“One person can change a marriage by doing something different. And so, it’s applying not doing what everybody else has said, works not doing what your parents did. The other statistics as the experts say: finances is the number one reason for divorce. In 30 years of counseling, we disagree. We’ve had couples arguing over finances. But that wasn’t the problem. The problem was selfishness. In our 30 years of counseling, unmet needs is the number one reason for divorce. Even when we’ve counseled couples through infidelity, we’ve counseled them through all sorts of problems. But it’s getting them to understand their differences. Start living that out, and then start loving their spouse as God’s called them to love their spouse.”

When it comes to our relationships with one another, we enter into our own understanding based on who we are and our past experiences. God created us for relationships, so it is inevitable that we will have conflict because we are fallen creatures. But we must not be discouraged. It is important that we recognize our vulnerability to attacks. The Apostle Peter recommends that we “Be sober-minded; be watchful. Your adversary the devil prowls around like a roaring lion, seeking someone to devour.” In order to maintain the garden of our marriage as described by Chris and Carmen Garner, work is required. Moreover, the walls of your marital garden are to be reinforced against any storms that are sure to come. The apostle continues by recommending the defensive stance couples are to take, “resist him, firm in your faith” knowing that together, as one flesh, you can withstand the flaming arrows of the enemy. If you are divided against one another, you are rendered vulnerable to attack. The couple devoted to living in a Christ-centered marriage is aware of their identity in Christ and with one another. They see the benefit of understanding their individual love language, and the importance of communicating with their spouse with selfless regard. But, as we have learned, if we become distracted by the concerns of life and neglect the necessary time to cultivate our garden, the weeds, and thorns will overtake and choke the tender blossoms. We’ll now hear from a couple who listened to Parts One and Two of Fortified Marriages and recalled their experiences in their 31 years together.

Show Notes

Opening Theme: Going For Gold

Transition Theme: Piano Background

Conclusion Theme: Love Piano by Synthezx

Transcript of “Fortified Marriages: The Commentary” - by Daphne Collins

Transcript of “Easy Believism” - by Laine Wilder

Castle/Fortress: Alanya Kalesi Castle in Alanya, Turkey; Khotyn Fortress in Chernivtsi Oblast, Ukraine